It's all in your head
by Monster-Maker
Summary: Valkyrie is serching for Skulduggerys lost skull when she is hit on the head by a frying pan. She wakes up as a prisoner in the crazy upsideown world of her mind where anything can happen. she must escape before this world consumes her in it's maddness...


1

Jack Frost

"Yes I know old Skulduggery .Have I seen his – seen his _what_?" Jacks sharp, cold, voice cut across the room.

Valkyrie took a moment to study Mr. Frost. He was the palest man she'd ever met, his hair, as white as snow, hung down to his ears and his skin was so unearthly colourless, he looked like every drop of blood had been leached from his veins.

As he pulled out a seat to sit down on, Valkyrie noticed, where his hand made contact with the chair, a coating of ice crystals spread like a virus from his fingers causing the chair to begin to frost over. It looked a bit like their front drive on a cold morning except far more sinister. Valkyrie imagined what his touch could do to living flesh and shuddered.

"His head Mr. Frost have you seen his head?" Solomon Wreath continued.

"Why? It's not like it'll do him much good where he is now, will it?" Jack carelessly waved his hand, his ice blue eyes watching them coldly.

Solomon hesitated slightly, "No not really–"

"Then why are you looking for it? Come on sit down, let me get you something to drink," Jack snapped his fingers and a goblin servant came to his side.

"Yes master? Can I get you anything?" the goblin's voice was deep and croaky, kind of how she would imagine the voice of a toad, had it climbed out of a pond and learnt to speak. Slowly she took a seat opposite Jack.

"A glass of champagne each for me and Mr. Wreath, and a glass of coke for the girl," the goblin bowed low, its greasy hooked nose almost brushing against the floor before he turned and left. Solomon hesitantly sank into the seat next to hers.

"Now I believe I asked a question?" Jack lent back in his chair and laced his pale fingers together.

"No reason, we just want it back that's all," Valkyrie tried to act innocent. Tried and failed.

Jack lent forward and placed his palm on the table. The same spiderweb pattern of frost began to spread out from his hand and creep over the table. Valkyrie could feel the room getting colder: her breath began to mist in the air.

"In my humble opinion, Miss Cain, lying is a despicable trait and I strive to avoid doing so as often as I can. I advise you to tell me the truth, Miss Cain; I am not a man you want to upset." An undertone of menace filled his words, and his eyes glacier blue held Valkyrie, frozen, like a rabbit before a fox; unable to look away – unable to run.

"We need it to bring back Skulduggery," Solomon chipped in his voice breaking the spell. Suddenly Valkyrie was able to drop her gaze and hide, looking down, she began examining the fabric of her coat sleeve. She did not look up at Jack again.

Valkyrie could hear the conversation continue without her, and tuned it out. It didn't matter. Still studying her sleeve, Valkyrie turned her mind back to the past few months.

After Skulduggery had vanished into the portal, she'd accepted Wreaths offer to train her in necromancy. According to Solomon, Valkyrie had shown an immense amount of natural talent. She'd soon grasped the basics of necromancy, and moved on to the more difficult stuff. Necromancers put most of their power in objects and she'd chosen her coat that Ghastly made.

Shadows curled like smoke from her sleeve, lashing at the air like a dozen tentacles before sinking back into the material. Then the shadows flowed up her arm like water down a stream and coated her hand like a second skin. The fingertips narrowed and elongated into, five, three inch talons, sharp enough to shear through flesh and bone like a hot knife through butter. Flexing her fingers, she willed the shadows to retreat back into the coat.

"...so you see finding Mr. Pleasant's head is the only way to get him back," Solomon finished.

Jack lent back in his chair and stoked his chin thoughtfully, his crafty eyes watching the always.

"And why do you think I may have anything to do with his head? You said it was taken by goblins: I don't see how this links back to me," Jacks voice was clear and innocent, but Valkyrie just knew he was lying.

"You control the goblins in Ireland, running them like your own personal army." She butted in just as the goblin came back with the drinks. There was something blackish green floating in Valkyrie's glass. She slowly pushed the glass away and continued.

"And kitchen staff apparently. Thing is we _know_ you've got it, so can we have it back now?"

Jack gave a short, sharp bark of laughter "A the young detective, I see why Skulduggery took you on," Jack picked up his flute of champagne and examined it as the frost crept across the glass and froze the liquid inside. "Thing is Old Bones and I didn't really get on. No sorry that's an understatement. He hated my guts and I hated his... I just hated him plain and simple. Now the last thing I want is him coming back so I'm afraid the skull stays where it is. Sorry 'bout that," Jack smiled unsympathetically, placing the frozen glass of the frozen table, and leaned back in his chair, like the cat that got the cream.

Valkyrie rose to her feet "No _I'm_ sorry Mr. Frost, but no is not an option. We need that skull, if you don't give it to us we'll have to try and alternative method of persuasion. Hand it over or we take it by force," Tendrils of shadow writhed around Valkyrie like angry snakes as the glossy black long coat coat sprouted spikes and blades on its shoulders, back and forearms and shadowy clawed hands formed over hers.

"Be my guest Miss Cain but you might want to take a look behind you," Jack smirked. Valkyrie ignored him but then she heard a deep and croaky chuckle from behind her. Turning too late, a starburst of lights and pain filled her head as she crumpled to the floor. The last thing she saw before she passed into unconsciousness was the silhouette of the goblin waiter hovering over her, holding a large and heavy frying pan.


End file.
